Monday, March 19, 2012

So, Rocks Actually Do Talk!

So he pitched the little stone...it fell just about three feet away from his feet.  His “Mouth wide open: Hah!-gotcha!” kind of smile as the rock hit the floor brought my husband’s words back from some time ago when discussing the kind of toys our son would need.  It was just Garrick and me, but it certainly felt as if hubby would’ve been there too saying: “Oh don’t worry Honey, all the child will need is a just a rock to play with”.  Ha, ha!..Well, I guess he was partially right.  

Here was Garrick, completely oblivious of the swings or even his mommy, but just completely delighted by flinging and picking up his rock.  He would throw it over the rail of the gazebo, thru the slates of the gazebo, on top of the pavers of the gazebo, on top of the sand or he would just hurl it ahead and pick it up from the grass.  All the while giggling with delight..so funny.  No play ground needed or any other toy. Just physics as his ever increasingly interesting friend.

One of my favorite things from posting..entertaining you with Garrick's pictures! =)

It was a very simple moment for mommy and son...but so heartwarming!  And Insightful!  It reminded me that God wired humans neatly to naturally learn.  The simplicity of the moment made it so perfect!

There a few lessons that I got from it that I want to share:

 1.  One of the best gifts I can give my child is my being willing and available:
Had I been busy trying to get done with laundry, or responding to emails, or face-booking  I would’ve missed it.  I feel weird about saying this, but I really didn’t do much.  I just took Garrick for a walk around the lake and let him drive the way. We talked a little when he pointed things out for me to tell him what they’re called.  But the meat of our experience was those 20 minutes right after he picked up his rock and headed towards the gazebo.  I was silent for mostly the whole time.  Yet I heard his heart talking loudly to mine:  Mom, thank you for watching me play. Thank you for bringing the whole of you to BE here.  I can see that this will be a recurrent theme throughout our whole life.  And I hope that I will never forget, especially when he hits the teen years.  Something tells me that he would always take my company better than a set of clean socks, I want to say most of the time. Well, I know, I wish this would preclude me from doing laundry for good...but dreaming is for free right?!!

So mom please, be quiet! I'll do the reading today! =)

2.   Children don’t need expensive, fancy featured toys or places to have fun:


I have just learned that investing money in lots of toys is just not worthy.  I know marketing tells you differently. And 24/7.  I really can’t imagine how much more of a hassle would be to clean our house if I listen to them!  Plus I don’t know if my son is a little different, but he normally plays one to two minutes with a toy and then moves on to the next activity.  Which normally is more exploring, climbing or wondering freely - I know probably a boy thing. Or he would prefer to explore the REAL, “non-toy looking “items around the house. So I have just opted for using homemade toys, made out of ordinary things around the house or when I do buy something is more likely from the consignment store.  However, I am still trying to constantly remind myself, that not any amount of toys would make them more appealing to Garrick than playing with his still favorite toy: Me.  And with this I don’t want to give a guilt trip to anybody.  I struggle with this one myself.  Especially when I’m peeling that potato and he loves to hang on to my leg and try to pull me away from the kitchen to play with him!

Are you sure this bike ride is just taking us 20 minutes mom? You're kind of slow...:P


But one of the neatest ideas I learned some time ago is the “daily 20 minute 1 on 1 rule”.  If I can at least get in 20 minutes every day of uninterrupted, unrushed, meaningful interaction where he has my full attention, then I feel accomplished.  A lot more accomplished than if he had played with expensive toys all day long.  Some days I can do more, some days I make it to bed and realize I couldn’t get it. But at least knowing that I’m mindful of it puts my heart at peace.  I know there is a place for toys.  And I also use them sometimes; otherwise I couldn’t get anything done around the house! And I also know that either incidentally or eventually he would get more and more into playing with artifact as he gets older. Maybe one day he’ll like to play with robots as His daddy does, or something else.  I know that there may be a time where he wouldn’t find me as appealing as a play mate as now…and I know that I will miss that. So for now, I’ll be it!

So what do you guys think, do I look smart?

Yes I do! Especially when I'm next to daddy!

3.  Learning is a natural experience:


So just 20 minutes of free play with a rock and he learned that objects make different sounds when falling on different grounds, He also learned that the more strength he applies to his throw the higher the rock went, etc. No kidding, when we came back he started playing with his balls at home more purposely.  I know I have to work on preventing accidents...like broken windows! I know. Working on it! But this rock was really a talker. It confirmed even more that children learn naturally without much rigorous planning or tedious structure.  They are happily absorbing the world and finding out how it works. That’s their primary job.  And as an over-controller freak in recovery, this gives me lots of peace of mind.  Such a timely insight as we go thru the process of learning about home education.  

So mom, are you sure this is the best way to learn to play basketball?


We recently went to a Homeschooling conference where I was introduced with a little more detail to the education philosophy of Charlotte Mason.  And it seems like it goes somewhat on this direction. The Ambleside website, which is very helpful to understand her ideas says:  “Charlotte Mason felt that that children could and should learn by dealing with real things in their real world rather than an artificially manipulated environment.”  I don’t even want to dare to explain her teaching philosophy as I am just starting to learn about it, but I was recommended a good book as a starting point: For the children’s sake. I hope to learn lots from it as we learn more about different teaching approaches.

Ouch mom! This snake can really teach me about pain right?


For now I am enjoying the adventure of holding Garrick hands as he discovers his world. I am glad to know that my “facilitator/teacher” role will change during his learning years. But I know for sure that at this point no “Gymborees”, “ lab-schools” ,” creative play-times” or any other of these programs would make my child learn quicker.  My constant interaction with him and my giving him a natural rich environment with meaningful experiences will help him develop the skills and abilities that are naturally wired on him.  Naturally wired to develop at a very unique pace and way.  No need to rush anything.  No need to worry because he didn’t start walking as such and such age, or has uttered so many words by such time, or has been potty trained by 3. I know there are legitimate cases that justify further exploration of a delay. But before we get to that, let’s the children move freely within the natural gray-area of the development path.  Let’s give them the benefit of doubt grounded in their great developmental plasticity, before they’re labeled, before we let concern overwhelm us.  Let’s leave their little personalities blossom as we make the most of every natural teaching moment.  Let’s enjoy this wonderful gift of our mothering journey.  Let’s for now just enjoy listen  to the rocks talk!

Thursday, February 9, 2012

The 10 Things I Learned About Traveling Overseas with a Baby/Toddler. (Part 2)

Earlier this week I posted the first 5 lessons I learned about traveling with my little boy. I hope you found those helpful. Here it's the link to them if you didn't get to check them out before. Let's now pick up where we left off.. Ohh, and I hope you get to enjoy the pictures! =)

If you're curious about how Colombian folk music sounds like, take a pick at this video. It's a beautiful song about going back home after many years: "El Regreso" - "The Return". Can't tell you how emotional I got when I listened to it back in Cali!



Ok, now let's get to the meat! =P

6.  You really don’t need that 50pd packing allowance for your child!

I think I actually failed this test.  I confess, I over packed for Garrick.  And definitely, it was not necessary. Once over there, we discovered that just a 3 or 4 outfits were the handiest for most of the activities we planned, and those were the ones we kept on using.  I admit it made a big difference to have access to laundry since we were staying with family.  However, I think that I didn’t need that 3 week worth of outfits I took with me.  Nor many toys, children can be entertained with just about anything.  Interesting, how most of the time they rather play with the non-toy item or even a person, than a toy. So really, really, travel light!

The oldest church of the city located at the area where the city was founded.

Mommy I'm comfy with this outfit, can I wear this tomorrow? I always look prettier than my background anyway! =P


7.  Pack light so that you can pack bunches of diapers!
I actually learned that diapers are a lot cheaper in the U.S.  We actually brought a lot, but not enough. So we ended up having to buy diapers twice, for at least three times the price we pay for them here.  Arggh! Lesson learned!

That's right! Lite and easy is always better!

Thanks daddy, this Yummy "Salpicon" is just what I needed to fill my pamper up! =)

3.  Bumps and scratches are just part of the deal, not the end of the world

Maybe most of the veteran mommies out there already got over this one. But I actually had to cross this river while being there. Garrick’s first bloody boo-boo..arghhh, and it just happened while he was right next to me.  You know how blood makes everything a lot more dramatic than what it really is. So this happened to be just a little cut on his lip, which he forgot right after enjoying a popsicle.  It was funny to see him getting ready to go back and play in the very steps that he tripped on.  All he wanted was to toddle as a good toddler and keep up with the rest of the children. So the lesson here is to expect small accidents and to not panic when little ones do their job: Play, run, stumble and fall. Oh, and they will!  It was funny how right after the incident the seasoned mommies in the family surrounded me and calmed my heart by sharing their children’s first accident story.  The good news is that I also learned that mouth wounds heal pretty quickly too! =)

this is at my great school. I used to go down on thsi very slides as a child..here doing it with Garrick, 30sms years later!

Cousins goofing around..they could make a toy out of almost anything! =)


4.   Foreign germs may speak a different language but aren’t really any more harmful

I have to admit. I’m a recovering “germafobic”.  So I actually had to work on this one a few months before leaving.  Not only to apply it while traveling, but at home.  Interesting to see how both dads over there and here celebrate their children’s first time eating a little bit of dirt! I know, Yikes! But it’s true. Men tend to be more relaxed regarding germs and dirt.  But the fact of the matter is that unless you’re in a third world country where potable water and basic hygiene is not available, you shouldn’t be over concerned about this. As I said, babies grow overseas into healthy adults as well.  And Infant mortality rate is not higher than that of the U.S in many other countries.  Actually there is a current controversy regarding vaccinations in the U.S, and many of the comparative data comes from other countries where there are not compulsory vaccinations laws. However, most countries, and most people from developing countries follow regular vaccination schedules.  If that gives you any relief.  I learned to be a little more relaxed in that area and saved myself a lot of stress.  I have to admit that I was especially careful while in the airports.  

Mom can you please take me to the laundry please. I am all "germed up"! :p
   
Exploring the local arts & crafts at a very traditional area in the city called "Loma de la Cruz"

Bet you can't see this type of lanscaping anywhere else! =)

♫ We are family! ♪♫

With my dad and sister in the little family country house..


Isn't the view gorgeous?

5.  Relax and Enjoy, you’re enriching your child’s life by exposing him to the world
I can’t tell enough of the enriching experience this trip was for our family.  I can’t wait to start putting the pictures together on a special album and reminisce with Garrick.  We live on a world with greater possibilities, but also that feels smaller by the power of the internet.  Children now more than ever before grow to be aware of a globalized world.  So giving them early exposure to different cultures and languages actually helps to spark their curiosity and desire to learn different things.  I was completely delighted to hear Garrick repeating words in Spanish after his Spanish speaking cousins.  It was truly music to my ears. He doesn’t get the same exposure here, though I am working on it.  But I do encourage you if possible to look into bringing cultural diversity into your child’s world. And if your means allow for an overseas trip, go for it! I hope that some of these tips are helpful to you.
Dancing to the beat of  "Salsa" with my brother!

Our minute of fame! =)

Exploring a little timeless town out in the country..

Dave playing "Futbol" for first time..=)

Garrick speaking the language of the "Guacamayas"

At a museum of Colombian History..

In closing, let me just share that it was very special to hug and to love face to face all those who my heart had just kept in its memory for so many years.  I will never forget going down thru memory lane with my husband and son, both visiting for first time.  I think that getting a firsthand view and taste of my roots & heritage united us more as a bicultural family. I know we will always treasure our first trip to Colombia together.  Hope I get to hear about your traveling experiences too! Feel free to share any tips that you have picked up along the way!

Love,
Paola

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

The 10 Things I Learned About Traveling Overseas with a Baby/Toddler. (Part 1)

I can’t believe it’s been a month since we came back from our trip to Colombia.  I couldn’t believe either that it’s been almost 12 years since the last time I was there!  I have really enjoyed re-counting the memories of our trip with friends here that either like to learn about our culture, or are getting ready to go themselves.  And that is what has inspired this posting.  I have had at least two conversations with friends with little ones that are getting ready to travel overseas. 
I learned a lot from our first trip, and I thought it was a good idea to share it here.  I hope some mommies may  find it helpful someday when thinking travel. So here there are the 10 most important things we learned about traveling overseas with 17 month old Garrick..


But first let me introduce you to my town: Santiago de Cali - Colombia..on the left most point of South-America, right next to the Andes. I bet the pictures will keep you entertained as you read along..=)

1.       Realize that there are babies and toddlers over there too.

For some reason people assume that you have to bring everything you normally use for your baby at home when traveling.  They assume that everything overseas will be so different, that their baby won’t have what is needed to survive.  But the truth is that babies in other countries are also babies, no aliens. And families and people in general care for them to raise them healthy and safely, and they actually do grow strong and healthy eating their native food and enjoying the idiosyncrasies of their culture.  I was actually very surprised to see the playgrounds available in restaurants for children over there. They were far from being as closely monitored as the playgrounds here.  The issue of “liability” in the U.S makes this impossible.  Yet in Colombia, they don’t have a higher rate of accidents.  Parents are more relaxed in that area and children are raised to be more resilient, resourceful  and confident when facing danger.
Having fun while waiting for our pizza to be ready!

Mommy, I bet they'll let me get my driver license here!



2.       The four tricks that saved the day during the flights: A few interactive toys, a bottle of milk, tweaking the nap-time & a bit of Benadryl.

Well, we are aware that not all babies are equal. Temperament makes a big difference.  Therefore, some babies are easier to handle than others.  Our son happens to be somewhere in the middle of that spectrum.  We are very fortunate to have developed a routine for Garrick, so he normally takes at least one long nap during the day.  So the first thing we did was to ensure that he didn’t sleep before we got in the plane.  Once there, we let him play with some of his interactive toys.  I know most babies don’t use a bottle by the time they’re 17 months. But we decided to let Garrick splurge with this as we knew that it would be handy for our trip. And it was! We gave him a bottle during the take off to help him with the pressure change, and to also put a smidge of Benadryl in it to help him fall sleep. He played for an extra 20 minutes or so, and then slept for a long while! Benadryl had been approved by our pediatrician before and we had just used it once before and made sure that he didn’t have any abnormal reactions to it. So it worked as a charm, Garrick ended up sleeping at least 60% of the flight time which lasted a little over 4 hours.  And by the way, it’s only been one month after our trip and Garrick has already been weaned from the bottle.  No need to over-worry about that.  He didn’t grow an extra tongue or stopped eating. ;)
"The proof"

Sleeping well helps to enjoy the beauty outdoors! Here at Lago Calima, about 2 hrs from the city..


Garrick fell in love with the trampolin!

3.       Make sure that you train your child  to sleep in different settings and places.

This was a super plus. It allowed us to continue with his routine even though we were at a different place. This training actually started while Garrick was an infant, and it has paid us back in full!  We started letting Garrick sleep in his pack-n-play sometimes.  We also used different rooms, and made it a point to take him with us when visiting friends and teach him to sleep on his pack-n-play while we were visiting.  I have to admit that the only thing I hadn’t trained Garrick to do was to sleep with us in our bed.  Though we respect those families that co-sleep, that option didn’t work for us.  However, I have to admit that having taught Garrick to sleep with me sometimes would have been handy on at least one night over there when the sleeping arrangements didn’t allow us to sleep separately.  Needless to say that was a difficult night.  So I wouldn’t say that you have to co-sleep, but I would suggest teaching your children to fall sleep with you sometimes.  I’m all for establishing consistent routines for our children, but teaching a little bit of flexibility for traveling purposes is really helpful.

Mom, after a good nap, I'm ready to ride around the world!!

Singing Carols at the "Novenas" a type of advent tradition to celebrate Jesus' birth. people gather to do thsi with neighbors and friends for 9 days prior to Christmas day.

getting a ride by his cousin..

4.       Get a medium size, really compact, easy to carry non-umbrella type stroller

I can’t tell you enough how much I love the stroller we took with us.  I remember  being undecided on this subject the very night before our trip.  We have an umbrella stroller too. But we were undecided between that one, and a medium size one that is kind of a step up from the umbrella, yet not a full size stroller.  We were afraid that the airline won’t let us travel with a non-umbrella type stroller. However, Hurray for the moment with decided on the bigger stroller.  They didn’t give us any problem at all. The one we used was the Jeep Cherokee sport stroller.  You don’t have to get this one, but be mindful of some of the advantages of these features:  First having a reclining seat gave us the advantage of letting Garrick take naps on his stroller.  That was a super plus, for those days that we were outdoors, sight-seeing and going back home was impossible. That was awesome. Did I mention that he actually learned this while in Colombia?  He never napped in his stroller before!  Second, the cargo capacity at the bottom and sides was great for carrying his diaper bag, water bottles and his mommy’s bags while being out shopping. =). This is a free standing, super compact stroller, so we could store it anywhere and would fit easily in the back of mostly any car. While riding small taxis, we would just fold it and put at front of the copilot seat.  Sweet!  So no umbrella strollers for us when traveling! =)

Nothing like walking along the river almost every morning..

Rio Pance..at the south of the city..we used to go to splash, eat of its banks and hike along with our family..good memories..


Reminiscing...

5.       Be prepared for changes on your child’s routine and feeding patterns

I have worked so hard trying to get Garrick to eat consistently healthy and at the right times, but with all the changes of places, people, events, we couldn’t keep it up.  Garrick had a temporary change on this area.  I almost expected it.  I’m not saying that that would happen to every baby, but it was our case.  He would not eat at his usual times and would reject foods that he normally loves at home. What I resorted to do was to make sure that we drank his fortified milk, and water.  I also gave him enough of the few foods he was taking. So he got LOTS of oatmeal, avocados, plantains, tomatoes, yogurt and eggs. I didn’t give up on letting him try a variety of foods all the time as usual, but I confess, with little success.  He was just enjoying the excitement of the new surroundings and family!  I was pleasantly surprised with how much he liked a Colombian fruit called “Guanabana”.  So he got lots of that too.  He went back to his regular eating habits right after coming back home, and he didn’t get sick or lost any weigh.  So no reason to panic about this.
Food was a big theme on our trip..so here we are..at our welcoming meal: Sancocho the Gallina..a super yummy traditional soup!

Some of our staple Christmas foods, from right to left: Natilla, Papaya in Almibar, Hojaldras & Bunuelos..Yum!

Cholados!..Bunches of fruit served in a very interested, super delicious way..

Family breakfast in the country..with "Arepas, scrambled eggs & Hot chocolate" =)

Patacon pisao..This is a dish served on bed of "Plantain" a staple in our culture as well..

The Fruit paradise!

"Mango Viche" & "Chontaduro"..the first in unripe mango served with salt and lemon & the second is a soft nut..both are snack that you can get everywhere overthere..

"Pandebonos" a very popular breakfast treat..We couldn't have enough..Garrick actually loved these ones too!!

I'll be back pretty soon with the rest of the tips! ..

Sunday, December 4, 2011

In Loving Memory of Jesse Bush

Just a few days have passed and my heart still swells
As my aching soul refuses to stop gathering the bountiful harvest of every day;
Oh my child, how short was your stay with us
Yet, how long and plentiful the legacy you left;
All I have is a few memories with you to recount
Nonetheless, they were planted deep into my spirit, deep into my faith;
They are growing like giant mulberry trees
Reaching high, reaching deep
Reminding me of the most important tie I will ever have
The tie between heaven and me.

 
My dear child how small you were
Thus, I am still at awe at the size of your soul,
A soul divinely handcrafted to bless and to hold
To gaze with my heart as I imagine you grow,
Grow as my big tree with branches reaching wide
Bearing emotions, thoughts and lessons galore,
Because your littleness stroke the chord of time
That one that makes my mind apprehend
That my days are just a mere handbreadth
Regardless if you make it to ninety days, years or until the very end.
I can only be grateful to the One who decides
How many they will be,
Because He spared you the sufferings of this world
And though we still grieve your departure from us
It is ever comforting to know
That He holds you close by His very hand
On this very moment, on your very sight.


My precious child I want you to know
That the freshness of your passing has been surrounded with the smell
Of the advent of our Savior who was once another Babe;
He is my Lord and I know yours too,
I know He created you, and loves you more than I do;
He is the one that planted you into my body,
Into my heart,
And made it possible by His death on a tree
For us to hope for the day
The future glorious day
Where our eyes will see Him,
And then we will see you again.
We will embrace, and will laugh and will both radiate
His light shining into our own very faces;
We will reminisce the days of our waiting here
And how only His strength and hope for that moment
Made us see the value and beauty of each today
Helping us appreciate life here on earth
As a very blurry reflection of our future home
We will understand then, though it will matter no more
Because you will be there too
Hearing His voice filling everything
While He embraces me, and tells me:  Well done.
In Jesus, in Jesus, It was done!


My beloved, my little one
I am very grateful that you are part of my life
You were asked for and you were indeed given,
You were, and for many special reasons,
Many I still don’t know;
some, I am just starting to realize;
But one I certainly do.
Because the name we chose for you
Was “Jesse”, my little child,
A name that stands for “God exists”
For this hope for heaven
That you stirred and fanned into flame
Is the assurance that He indeed does;
And because of that
You do too,
And we can say boldly as His word says:
To forget what lies behind
And strain toward what is ahead,
Knowing that one of those wonderful
Wonderful, precious and marvelous things
Is you my dear one,
You.

Mom.